blanketbythestairs:

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bestttt ever

Source:bobbymilk

A dramatic Shakespearean response to every situation

  • When something bad happens: True is it that we have seen better days.
  • When something REALLY bad happens: O woe! O woeful, woeful, woeful day! Most lamentable day. Most woeful day That ever, ever I did yet behold! O day, O day, O day! O hateful day! Never was seen so black a day as this.O woeful day! O woeful day!
  • When people say that something is wrong because the Bible says so: The Devil can cite scripture for his purpose.
  • When my girlfriend abandons me for food: FRAILTY, THY NAME IS WOMAN!
  • When someone doesn't thank me for holding the door open for them: BLOW, BLOW, BLOW, THOU WINTER WIND! THOU ART NOT SO UNKIND AS MAN'S INGRATITUDE!
  • When I burn something while cooking: MY CAKE IS DOUGH!
  • When human stupidity frustrates me: LORD, WHAT FOOLS THESE MORTALS BE!
  • When someone says I'm going to hell for my sins: NYMPH, IN THY ORISONS BE ALL MY SINS REMEMBER'D.
  • When I'm broke: My pride fell with my fortunes
  • When someone turns the light on after a period of darkness and blinding light ensues: OH, SHE DOTH TEACH THE TORCHES TO BURN BRIGHT!
  • When someone disagrees with me: THERE ARE MORE THINGS IN HEAVEN AND EARTH, HORATIO, THEN ARE DREAMT OF IN YOUR PHILOSOPHY.
  • When I argue with my girlfriend: The course of true love never did run smooth.
  • When I'm embarrassed: MUST I HOLD A CANDLE TO MY SHAMES?!
  • Someone says "Good Night": Good Night, Good night! Parting is such sweet sorrow, that I shall say good night till it be morrow.
  • When I'm doing the laundry: OUT, damned spot!

  • Ann: Describe your ideal man.
  • Leslie: He's dark and mysterious and he can sing and he plays the organ
  • Ann: I think you just described the Phantom of the Opera.
  • Leslie: Mmm!

cumberbitchsandwich:

I deduce that the Holmes brothers are going to lose me some followers this morning.

^this

Source:suhnarl

sherlockspeare:

wootot:

WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED LAST NIGHT？？？？

A very good thing


I love how the lube says “sh<3jw”

Source:sh2jw

cumberbitchsandwich:

gokiwi:

cumberbitchsandwich:

First photo: I didn’t see the phone in Sherlock’s hand at first.

Second photo: The look on John’s face. WHERE IS HIS RIGHT HAND?

You know where.

It’s like John’s all ‘Imma touch the glove look Sherlawk Imma touch the glove’

And then Sherlock’s all ‘Who are you and why are you watching us?’ and John all ‘Now he was distracted ‘cause I was gonna though the glove so now Imma touch the butt oops they see me hmmmmm’

^This
Source:cumbercrieff

Anonymously try to seduce me.


angelsdontbreathe:

thetardisinhogwarts:

frenchie-atbakerstreet:

space-antrum:

cosmostrekker:

cumberhiddles:

estherparker:

Just click the audio and watch the lovely icon. 

(source [x], [x])

omfg i am dying brb

THE BEST THING.

JUST HIT PLAY.

GOD THIS IS PERFECT

I LOVE EVERYONE IN THIS BAR FANDOM

Source:aqueousserenade.deviantart.com / Etlerto

pernillo:

tobycarsonphilips:

lancasterandwaters:

Shit Starkids Say

http://lancasterandwaters.tumblr.com/post/15316310346/i-respect-your-argument-but-meredith-stepien-is

also: “Why do I live in Europe???”

I have begun to say “Am I… Am I bleeding?” everytime I hurt myself. Even when there’s nobody around. 

I do the “Am I.. Am I bleeding?” *shows someone my hands* thing a lot too. I’m sure it would be funnier if I had friends who understood what that meant instead of just saying, “uh no. You just stubbed your toe, so no, your nose is not bleeding, you moron”

Source:littleturtleduck


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